Gay Daddy & Bear Blog: Age Appropriate

May 6, 2013
Category: Relationships
Respect Gay Relationships Logo

I’m all about giving people a chance. Things happen, people have off days, and I guess at the very core of it, I believe that people are inherently good. But at a certain point, no matter how badly you want something to work, you’ve got to put you first. How many times have you given someone you're dating a pass or two when they’ve done something you don’t agree with? Whether it’s calling you back, blowing off plans, or even cheating on you, there are a lot of red flags that we all seem to easily forgive. Once forgiven, it sends a pretty clear message that it’s acceptable behavior and that there’s a lack of respect that will ultimately play a larger role in the relationship. Now I’m talking about the very minor to the very major when it comes to the types of things that we’re all willing to accept, but they all yield similar results.

A friend of mine recently showed up for a date in which the man he was seeing showed up with two unexpected friends. But instead of staying and being part of a date night that was not what he had in mind, he simply told the guy that this wasn’t what he envisioned and that he was going to head home. My initial response was that my friend overreacted and his actions were a little extreme. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized how it important it is to be clear about what you’re looking for, what you want, and what you’re willing to accept. And you know what? The guy called him later that night to apologize and realized that he wasn’t being very respectful of their original plans.

It’s no big secret that I’ve been...

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Official MISTER
May 3, 2013
Category: Gay Culture
Sam Champion Gay Celebrity

MR. Sam Champion is this week's Real Man We Admire.

We know, spring might have officially sprung way back in March, but it wasn't until this week that New York City, home to the MISTER headquarters, really started to feel the change of seasons. Now that it's here, we're looking forward to this week's Real Man We Admire, "Good Morning America" weatherman Sam Champion, letting us know about all all the beautiful days that lie ahead.

With a prime spot on America's #1 morning show, the 51-year-old brings viewers around the world a little ray of sunshine Monday through Friday with his informative weather reporting, and easy rapport with co-hosts Robin Roberts and George Stephanopoulos. But for us, it's his willingness to not be afraid to reveal who he really is that keeps us tuning in. This past October, Champion revealed on air that he had gotten engaged to his partner of three years, artist Rubem Robierb. While his sexuality was somewhat of an open secret when he was  local weatherman on New York City's WABC-TV, going public on a show whose popularity is dependent upon big-time advertisers and support from Middle America was definitely a risk.

In perhaps a sign of the changing times, barely anyone balked. In fact, the show trumpeted the nuptials, keeping viewers up-to-date on the big day (the wedding went off without a hitch this past New Year's Eve) and featuring it prominently on their website. And when viewers did express bigotry...

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April 29, 2013
Category: Sexuality
Swiss Army Knife

It can be pretty mind blowing when you sync up with someone your dating or hooking up with sexually. For all the variable that go into the relationship equation, when 2 bodies together equal great sex, I'd call that a big win. Everyone brings something different to the sexual table, whether that's giving good head, good rim jobs, or being one hell of a great kisser, and this is when we can take these superlative studs and learn from them. After all sexual exploration is all about experience and gaining knowledge about what you like/don't like and learning new techniques. I would say of all the reasons to have an open relationship, bringing home something new to your skill set is one of the least discussed. And it can do wonders for your sex life. Even as a singleton, when you find someone who's the best at what they do, it can be life changing. It had been a while since I had a great kisser in my life and recently dated someone that reminded me of how good it can be when lips works together to make magic.

But now I want to open the floor to all of you, think of the comments as a sales floor and sell us on your best sexual skill set is. Or tell us a tale of the best you've ever had below.

Official MISTER
April 27, 2013
Category: Gay Culture
Kelvin Atkinson Gay Politician

MR. Kelvin Atkinson is this week's Real Man We Admire.

Honest, candid, and vulnerable aren’t the first words that come to mind when we think of politicians, but they perfectly sum up Kelvin Atkinson, this week’s Real Man We Admire. The Nevada state Senator (D-North Las Vegas) surprised many of his constituents and fellow politicos this week when he publicly came out during a debate to repeal his state’s ban on gay marriage.

“I’m black. I’m gay. I’ve dealt a lot with what people are talking about,“ he announced on the state Senate floor, in what felt like a completely raw, unrehearsed moment. “I know this is the first time many of you have hear me say that I’m a black, gay male.”

The 44-year-old, who has been part of Nevada’s legislature for more than a decade, says he was moved to come out after listening to months of heated discussion from voters over Senate Joint Resolution 13, which would abolish the heterosexual definition of marriage that’s been in Nevada’s Constitution since 2002.

“I didn’t think. I just knew it was time,” he told reporters afterwards. “I never considered myself not out. I didn’t care who knew, I just didn’t ever think that I needed to make a public statement about it.”

We’re glad you did, Senator, and we wish more public figures would follow suit. Not only did the bill pass (Nevada residents will vote on the issue in 2016), but Atkinson claims his speech swayed at least two other lawmakers...

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Official Daddyhunt
April 24, 2013
Category: Sexuality
Greg Scarnici Put a Finger On It Video

We’re big fans of furry funnyman Greg Scarnici’s ability always find the humor in taboo topics, and his latest comedy video, “Put a Finger In It,” is no exception. This hilarious ode to the art of, umm, shall we say, “digital” love had us rolling, and we think you’ll give it two big thumbs up, too.

Now, we know some of you guys, particularly those who prefer the top bunk, might find the idea of having someone pull up to your bumper somewhat of a touchy subject, but we’re curious: does the desire for anal stimulation when you're getting your rod worked on mean you might secretly be a closet bottom?

The answer, at least according to this article we found on Psychology Today’s website, is not necessarily. In fact, it just means you’re completely normal. Turns out people of all sexual persuasions—including 24% of straight men—enjoy the art of the backdoor finger bang every once in a while.

So go ahead, all you top dogs out there, embrace your inner bottom. Better yet, share your favorite techniques for getting into the dig in the comments section. We promise nobody will point fingers. Well, unless you want them to.

April 23, 2013
Category: Gay Culture
Hairy Gay Muscle Bear

As I've come to realize, once you have a type it's pretty hard to step outside of what you like. No matter how hard you try. I can pinpoint pretty significant instances when I realized that I liked hairy guys and then subsequently was attracted to older hairy guys. Both stem from my adolescence (one in my middle school gym class and the latter due to my hot as hell 8th grade Earth Science teacher) and proved to be pretty formative in shaping the rest of my gay adult life.

But I want to hear from you guys, when did you know you liked older or younger guys? Was it a specific person or experience that left a mark on you? Let's start a discussion on how our attractions (and ultimately types) are created in our lives.

Official MISTER
April 21, 2013
Category: Gay Culture
Chris Salgardo Kiehls Gay Bear

Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who’s the fairest bear of all? The answer just might be Chris Salgardo. As president of Kiehl’s, one of the biggest names in skincare, this bearded beauty is not only blazing a trail in the business world, he’s also giving antiquated ideas of what it means to be butch an extreme makeover.

With his preference for sporting muscle tees and tight jeans rather than three-piece suits and power ties, Salgardo is hardly your average buttoned-up businessman. But what most sets him apart in our eyes is his insistence on being out and proud in a corporate environment where conservatism—even in the beauty industry—is the name of the game and being openly gay can still cause eyebrows to wrinkle. It’s a decision that Salgardo is anything but apologetic about.

“You have to provide good role models for kids who are struggling, so it’s important to be visible and show the leader of a major corporation can be gay and successful,” he told Out magazine.

Adding to this role-model status are Salgardo’s many philanthropic endeavors. Under his leadership, Kiehl’s has created collaborations with top artists, celebrities, and athletes to raise money and awareness for organizations within its three pillar causes: HIV/AIDS, the environment, and children’s charities.

But it’s Kiehl’s LifeRide for amfAR event that’s pushed the company’s mission of giving back to the community into overdrive. This annual 10–day, 1,800-mile charity motorcycle ride from...

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April 17, 2013
Category: Wellness
Dove Beauty video

This powerful new commercial for Dove may be about the way in which women perceive themselves, but this idea isn't exclusive to women. In fact, I'd say many men, especially gay men, share in the inaccurate ways we see ourselves. Body dysmorphia, when a person has a negative distortion of his/her body image, is extremely prevalent in our society. With so much emphasis on beauty, and in our community, having the "perfect body," it's no wonder our perceptions are so out of whack. We're constantly comparing ourselves to what we see in the media (porn included) that we sometimes can't see ourselves and how beautiful we really are. This brilliant ad is eye opening and I hope that it's message of beauty in all forms extends not just to women but to all of us.

Today, take a good hard look at yourself in the mirror and appreciate all that you are. You may not see it now, but the rest of the world certainly does.

April 15, 2013
Category: Relationships
MISTER Carl Sandler on Sirius XM Radio

A friend in need is a friend indeed, especially when it’s 2:00 in the morning, you’re horny, and that friend lives just 5 minutes away. Hey, we’re all about friends with benefits, but what if those perks involved more than just a post-shag baby wipe and a pat on the butt as you headed out the door to go back home? You know, real benefits, like engaging conversation, shared interests, and a shoulder to lean on when you’re down in the dumps?

Sounds great, right? Unfortunately, for many of us, those types of relationships just don’t exist. Let's face it, as gay men, we live in a culture where making “friends” means firing up an app, “networking” is code for getting naked, and hooking up is the new handshake—all of which make it difficult to cultivate deep and meaningful friendships with one another that aren’t rooted in sexual attraction or superficiality. The truth is we need to have these friendships, especially as we get older, but in this age of instant gratification, are we willing to buddy up with someone we don’t want to sleep with?

The answer is yes—that is, if you’re willing to make the effort. In his latest appearance on Sirius OutQ’s “The Morning Jolt” radio show, our resident den daddy, MISTER CEO Carl Sandler, sat down with host Larry Flick to talk about the importance of friendships and offered up some tried-and-true tips on how you can develop them, deepen them, and put them to bed (pun intended!) when they’re not working for you.

Click the play button...

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April 15, 2013
Category: Entertainment
How To Adjust Your Balls in Public

I'm not gonna lie, I'm horrible about "adjusting" in public. And by horrible, I mean I pretty much just go for it and tug/fix/move/scratch my balls in public without ever really thinking about the consequences. It wasn't until recently when I was simultaneously walking my dog (not a euphemism) and full on hands down my pants fixing my junk that I got quizzical/nasty look from a passerby. At which point I decided that maybe I should work on being a bit more discreet about it. Luckily, I stumbled upon this handy "how to" that offers some hilarious tips about getting the job done in various settings:

Do you have any tips on how to adjust in public? Help your fellow man in the comments below.